Goldilocks Coffee Musings

Coffee cup with steamI’m sitting here with the bleach in my hair getting rid of my roots.  I’ve been enjoying sporting the white hair for a while now, ever since that little mistake of trying to take my hair from auburn to Marilyn Monroe blond on my own.  It was a beautiful, creamsicle orange when I was finished.  My stylist told me I saved her about 2 hours by getting it that far so bravo me.  I haven’t determined if I will go back to my natural, dark blond again, I’m liking this bleached out look for now.

2013 is my year.  13 is a lucky number in my family, kind of a hereditary oldest child thing from what I can tell.  Gramps lucky number, then mom’s and then  mine.  I’ve always had a thing for the number since so many others find it bad luck.  For me, it seems to be the opposite.  So this is my year, 2013.  I’m excited at the possibilities that are ahead of me.  New career in the medical field, though I will keep the Avon business going, that seems to be a niche for me that I was not aware of before.  I have a real heart for the elderly and the younger folks in long term care facilities, that cannot take care of themselves or need a little help with daily functions.  I hated to admit it but it got to me and pulled me in!  I hate to admit it because I never gave it a thought in the past, when I could have been done with the training and been working in the field long ago.  But then I do not believe in accidents and obviously the timing wasn’t right before, now it is perfect.

This year is all about establishing deeper relationships with my kids and grandchildren.  DOING things together, spending time sharing and enjoying times, making memories.  I love this new chapter, the one titled GRANDMA, and I plan to make the most of it and embrace it with gusto.  I’m turning 50 this year, in 134 days to be exact, and I am going to enjoy that for all it is worth as well. YAY ME! Half of a marvelous century old, and not slowing down!  Bring on life, I’ve got this!

I am going to begin working on writing  novels this year, a dream I’ve had for a long time.  Lord knows my life is full of material that would make a best seller, in my opinion, so might as well start the process of developing characters and plot lines.  I love to write, I’m told by many of my readers that it is a talent I possess, so why not?  There are many who have encouraged me to write books.  I haven’t totally committed to a pen name yet, as I’m uncertain exactly what to use.  I have considered my name from the swinger days, Jaz, but not sure I want to do that.

I also want to get some things made for my Etsy shop.  Though I might just have my brother build me a website to use to sell things I make and that my sister makes.  We have our name for our creations ready to go, just need to actually DO something with it.

And yes the Avon business will be in full swing.  I’ve totally let that slide with things going on in my life, like my POS car, but I know that I need to do more with it and so I’ll be kicking that up.  I’m actually starting to plan out my time, scheduling everything from reading to crochet to writing, studying for the state exam then working in the nursing facility all the while dealing in cosmetics.

These are the reasons being single is a good thing for me at the moment.  Not that I’d not consider a relationship, as I said the door is not closed, but in order to do that it has to be someone who is not overly needy of my time and attention.  Someone who can encourage me to soar and not try to clip my wings or limit my progress.  Definitely someone without a shattered past.  Sure, we all have dysfunctional lives and carry baggage along this road, but I have a tendency to get involved with men who have severely broken pasts, and I cannot help them fix that nor do I want to help them lug all that baggage with them.  Both husbands and pretty much every man I’ve dated had a past that wasn’t just broken, it was pretty much shards of splintered glass crushed over and over underneath the feet of people in their lives.  I cannot do that again.  I don’t have the time or desire to help someone heal from their painful past life.  I guess that sounds incredibly selfish, but I am not a professional and therefore I am limited in what I can do to assist.

But right now, as the hair is processing, thanks to my sister being so willing to do the dye jobs around the Diva Den (thanks sooo much!), I think it is time for a round of Plague, Inc., the game I’ve been hooked on thanks to my children.  Now, if only the ‘world’ would stop trying to heal itself and let me destroy the population of the earth so I can level up.