10 Things I’ve Learned In 2012


10 Things I’ve Learned This Year

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  1. Sometimes people are going to let me down, take sides in something that is none of their concern (like my divorce), because they are closer to the other person.  They may say things at the time that are hurtful and even mean where I’m concerned.  They may never come get  my side of the story.  But it’s okay to forgive them, because forgiveness isn’t about them, it’s about me.  Me healing, me getting rid of that little seed that grows bitterness and isolation from folks that would otherwise love me.  And in the end, maybe, just maybe, their comments and criticisms were  justified, as my actions or behavior at times might have been less than what it should have been.  Perhaps I brought it on myself, perhaps not.  Either way, I cannot expect perfection from anyone until I myself am perfect.  And that work is still in progress.
  2. My grandmother used to say that the road to hell is paved with good intentions.  Took me years to figure that one out but it makes sense to me now.  I’ve learned this year that all my good intentions to do various things, while they were indeed good, not acting upon them made them worthless.
  3. “Nothing worthwhile comes easily. Half effort does not produce half results, it produces no results. Work, continuous work and hard work is the only way to accomplish results that last.” (Hamilton Holt)  I’ve learned this is SO very true.  Having my own business, Avon, when I gave it my all, it was doing very well.  But when I got lazy and slacked off…it went in the hole.   I know enough very successful direct sellers in Avon and other businesses to know that the hard work does pay off.  I just need to apply myself again.
  4. Sometimes “it’s all about me” isn’t selfish at all, it just means I’m not ready to be someone’s significant other.  22 years of loving one person the way I loved my ex-husband doesn’t go away over night or over a period of months.  A lot of introspection and healing needed to take place.  No matter how much I was loved and adored, or how much I tried to return that, it wasn’t going to work.  I not only caused pain for someone else, but ripped open parts of me that were not completely healed and prolonged my need for things to be all about me.
  5. I’ve learned that living in the moment is a good thing, as we just never know that tomorrow is a given.  But that we also have to step back and look at the bigger picture because decisions made in the moment can and often will impact us for a life time.
  6. Even the most positive people get the blues, and that is okay.
  7. Second chances are fine, and I’m willing to give anyone a second chance.  But when it comes to my heart, hopes and dreams, you only get one second chance.  So if you tell me you love me then disappear a second time, the next time…well there won’t be one.   Beyond second chances, I’m just not willing to try again.
  8. If something or someone sounds too good to be true, listen to your gut instincts.  Time and time again I’ve fallen for the words that are never followed up with realities.  I’m a slow learner but this time I got it.
  9. I don’t need anyone to complete me.  I am complete all on my own.  No one is the other half to my whole. I am whole.  Anyone that I share my life with is someone that compliments and enhances parts of me.
  10. Sometimes the best laid plans fall apart.  And it’s okay to be be disappointed and even have a good cry.  But wait for it, there is always what we call plan B.  Sometimes, plan B is even better.

Life is All About How you Handle Plan B
Plan A is always my first choice.
You know, the one where
Everything works out to be
Happily ever-after.
But more often than not,
I find myself dealing with
The upside-down, inside-out version —
Where nothing goes as it should.
It’s at this point that the real
Test of my character comes in..
Do I sink, or do I swim?
Do I wallow in self pity and play the victim,
Or simply shift gears
And make the best of the situation?
The choice is all mine…
Life is all about how you handle Plan B.

~ Suzy Toronto

7 comments

  1. You have seriously learned life’s best lessons this year. It seems like it was painful, but your growth has been exponential. Wow. Loved every single one of them.

  2. This was wonderful and I love that thought about Plan B. Most of us if honest are living Plan B. Even those who think they are living Plan A. Their Plan A is just an adjustment after Plan B event happened. They just forgot. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving with those you love.

  3. Love that end photo! SO TRUE and listening to your gut is so important in life. If we can’t trust ourselves who can we trust?

  4. Number 9 is so important! I didn’t figure this one out until I separated then eventually divorced my first husband. Divorced or not, I wish more women would learn this about themselves.

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