Blogging – Balance or Bail?

I’ve come to the point of questioning myself and my blogging, as far as continuing on the current path, achieving a balance or just bailing. I have practiced a policy of non-censorship in my writing as far as sharing information from my thoughts and heart.  My writing is my therapy and I just let things fly when I feel like it.  But I have been given food for thought several times that makes me sit back and ponder.

I have been told people think I am some kind of a nut case, based on my postings.  I admit freely,  that in the early days of  this blog page I was a mental and emotional train wreck.  My world had been flipped on end and I was all over the map.  I think most folks going through a divorce ARE all over the charts like that, the difference is my readers were given a look inside my heart and head, places the average soul isn’t so willing to share.  I received plenty of emails from others telling me it was nice to see that they were not alone in feeling they were fragmented.

It is difficult at times to write knowing that something might upset someone I love and hurt their feelings.  Or that what is said might impact them in other ways, as in friends reading it and thinking my offspring have a looney tune for a mother.  Okay they do but that isn’t the issue.  Sometimes when I vent it can put my kids or friends in a place of feeling they are stuck in the middle of say me and the ex husband.  A lot of folks just don’t seem to understand I can be pissed as hell and vent it but that doesn’t mean I hate him.  Fantasy dialog a friend used to call it.  Where you make a remark like “life would be so much easier if so-n-so fell in front of a moving freight train”.  Of course you don’t mean it, but venting does help one feel better.

I struggled with the idea of just not blogging anymore, however I love to write and don’t want to give it up.  I am very open about things in my life, and that sometimes may be too much information for those close to me.  But finding the balance of being true to myself, uncensored and still being careful how it impacts others…well it was giving me a headache to say the least.

This morning my blog buddy, Cinful Cinnamon, sent me a link to check out a blogger that has  similar dilemmas and her solution.  I like it.

I have started a page, The Private Thoughts of Marvi Marti. The page is part of this site, listed up top, that is password protected.  Just because you ask doesn’t mean you will be given access.  Those  given the password must be trusted to keep what they read there to themselves.  It is to protect the feelings of those closest to me.  It is a look into my private thoughts, into my heart and only select individuals will be given that much access.  Contact me at to request access.

So, I  feel better now that I can continue my page and still let it fly when something is itching to be written that might not sit so well with the audience of this page as a whole. Thanks, Cinnamon, fantastic idea!


  1. For what its worth, I’ve never thought that anything you’ve said seemed hateful or mean spirited. You always seem to be careful to word things in such a way as “this makes me feel” rather than “so and so is an ass” or whatever. I love that you are open and honest. I have a more private journal online that I’ve had for 8 years now, like yours it is for “friends” only and isn’t public. I think it is a healthy thing to do, to write and share your thoughts, vents and concerns with other friends.

    • Do you keep that journal as a different blog page or is it a page within your current blog that requires a password?

  2. Boy that Cinnamon is one smart bitch ! LOL.. Seriously, I think this will work out well. Sure, sometimes we should maybe “filter” our words. But I’d never want to see your light “put under a bushel basket”. And I don’t think your other readers would either.

  3. What a great idea….just perfect for you at this time!!! So glad you’ll continue your writing and blogging! Everyone deserves to have their own thoughts and it’s therapeutic for some to just write down those thoughts to clear their head at times.
    Postings on blogs does give others an “eye” into someone’s world and I totally understand not wanting to place someone between a “rock and hard place” even if they really don’t have to read the posts!!

    • Thanks. I think it will work well. Keeps everyone happy this way…as much as possible.

  4. I’m glad you’ve figured out a solution to allow continued self expression, but at the same time, think it stinks that you’ve had to create a separate page.

    For any of your readers whose opinions label you as unstable, too opinionated or a loopy, there’s a simple solution and change THEY can make:


    People who are envious of others always find ways to try shooting another person down, stealing someone’s thunder.

    So what if you feel like pouring out your heart. So what if you’re pissed and want to share your disappointments over your marriage. So what if you want to post about a date that went wrong.

    Your blog, right?

    I’ve got the nerve to talk because my blog uses my assumed name. Perhaps that was why I chose to remain anonymous? What I do certainly pales in comparison to the depths you take your readers, but still..

    I admire you for putting it out there.

    • Thanks. I will still write pretty openly but once in a while I may land something on the private thoughts page and that at least allows me to let it fly when it needs too! 🙂

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