I think we learn new things every day, at least I feel I do. Sometimes the lessons are impacting and take our breath away, other days they are small and seemingly insignificant. Either way, even when we do not take time at the end of the day to reflect upon them, there were lessons learned from the time our eyes opened.
Yesterday I learned….
It is possible to forgive someone you love, and start over from square one. You can put it all behind you and renew a friendship. That sometimes that person, while they are not someone you can have as a partner, can be one of the very best friends you will ever know and care about, and they will be there to help you pick up the pieces of your broken heart and help you see that sometimes what seems so perfect was really not the best thing for you.
That when you cry on the back of a motorcycle, your tears dry faster as they blow away in the wind, and seem to take your pain along with them. And that sometimes, all it takes is a tiny gesture of caring, like someone reaching back and wrapping an arm around your leg and giving it a squeeze, to break the damn and let the tears come and the pain flow out and away on the wind.
That burgers, fries and cold beer in a little sports bar, can be some of the best comfort food ever tasted when shared with a good friend. And that the people that really care about you don’t push you away, they pull you closer, and find a way to fit you into their life.
While a good counselor can be a benefit, sometimes the best therapy is just talking it out with someone that has nothing to gain or lose from your choices in life, but just wants what is best for you and your happiness, they will ask the tough questions, and they will do it all for free, expecting nothing in return.
That sometimes, if we take just a moment longer to really look at something, there might be a lesson we’d otherwise miss. We parked the bike on a side street by city hall in Madison, and next door was this building. It had been all but destroyed by fire, and at first it made me really sad. I stopped and really lo0ked at it and then took a picture, feeling like there was something more I was supposed to be seeing.
In studying the picture closer today, it caught my attention that while the insides where burned and gutted, the outer shell of the building, the four walls that had supported the structure, were still there. The unique character and basic architecture was still there, just a bit scared from the flames. Inside were supports that were holding up those four walls, as obviously they plan to rebuild (click the photo to enlarge for a better view). It hit me that a year ago, my life was much like that building. Everything inside of me was seemingly destroyed and shattered, and that from outside looking in I was a real mess both mentally and emotionally, and it was out there via my posts for everyone to see the ugly remains. I had locked up what was left of my heart to keep everything and everyone on the outside. Unseen at first to some, supports were holding me up in the form of family, a few friends that stuck with me, even though I probably seemed like a lost cause. Through faith and determination I pulled myself together, while leaning on that support as needed, and rebuilt the floor plan of my life. I could not make it what it was before, that is all gone. But the foundation of who I am was still there, now completely uncovered and strong as ever, and I’ve slowly reconstructed my life. In the rubble I discovered so many parts of me that had been lost in the past. What rose from the ashes is far better and stronger than what had stood before. There will be changes made as life rolls along, we’re all a work in progress. But the bad stuff has burned away now and been replaced, I’m new and have a fresh start.
Life changes, sometimes fast, sometimes slow. Some things are minor, and some are major, impacting us to our core. We cannot get back the past, but we can build a wonderful present, and plan and dream for a better future.
Really, really good post Marti and one I can relate too. You are strong and have made it through the worst of it! Keep moving and growing!
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